The approach of fall always feels like a new year. School starts up again, the lazy – or busy – days of summer begin to fade, the sun sets before 8:00. We talk about the second Sunday in September as “opening” Sunday even though we have services all through the summer.
Over the last year, there’s been a shift in the Fellowship. Last August, I was meeting with members in small groups and hearing perspectives and experience of members and friends about their appreciations and concerns. Chief among the concerns was the conflict that had begun after the 2019 General Assembly in Spokane. The conflict had a number of facets: difference around the way to address issues around race; policies and practices at the Unitarian Universalist Association; and how the Adult Learning Program (ALPs) would be run. By the time I arrived, there were entrenched positions and sadness and hurt everywhere.
Over the course of the year the energy in the congregation has shifted. Attention was focused more on what we were doing: the events and activities from the picnic at the beginning of the program year, to the auction, and Dining for Dollars, among other events. Some classes got scheduled for the spring, and a group came together to reorganize our learning opportunities. The choir came together (many thanks to Pat Rodgers for her ongoing leadership!) and offered us a year of lovely music in worship. Worship services have been well attended, RE carries on with programming for the tiniest to the teens. The tension in the air has diminished.
An element of the diminished tension is the formation of a new fellowship started by former members of QUUF – the Salish Sea Fellowship. You may have seen notices or heard about it as they become established in the community. They offered some programming this past summer using the ALPs name, and will be offering fall programming, too.
Something I know for sure is that human beings grow and change. Sometimes it is an easy and welcome change: babies enter our lives, we fall in love, we build new friendships. Sometimes it’s hard and sad: marriages end, friendships get strained to breaking, our health fails, beloved people die. The notion that our lives, our relationships, or our institutions will always be as they have been has never been true. It’s all in flux always even if we don’t notice it.
All of this is to say that change happens. It’s been a practice of mine for many years to note change and to bless it, even when it’s hard and the loss feels great. Bless the change and let go of the wish that it be different than it is. I hope the folks who have created this new fellowship are getting what feeds them. I’m grateful that QUUF continues on, building and growing as we move into the fall and the new church year.
You can check out their new website at https://salishseafellowship.org/.
I used to be a Quaker and there was a split in the late 19th Century. Some members left and started new meetings with the others who agreed with them. One of the meeting houses I used to go to had a low railing down the middle of the pews. Each group in the split took one side, but they could still hear the messages from each other, still see each other, still shake hands and greet each other. Over time, the meeting reunited. I hope whatever barriers exist between QUUF and Salish Sea Fellowship will be low enough to reach across.
I am heartbroken that the new group, who used to be the Tomato Soup Group, never got a chance to speak to the whole congregation. After I expressed my own thoughts at a small group, speaking of the damage that happens when some members of a group are silenced so the whole cannot hear their concerns, Rev. Linda said to the group, “We’re going to lose some very good people”. That was me, as well as all those who formed the new Salish Sea Fellowship. Heartbroken.
Thank you, Linda. As Peg Hunter expressed, you succinctly “told the story.” As with Leslie Roubal, I am saddened that some people felt they had to leave QUUF, but also I am very much encouraged with the new growth we are experiencing. Kindness transcends everything.
Thank you, Rev Linda. In a few short paragraphs, you managed to capture the complex history of the conflict, the depth of emotions on both sides, and the feeling of hope as we move into this new church year.
Linda,
thank you for sharing your thoughts which have helped me
understand and accept the differences.Change and growth
and compassion are still the most important value for me.
Thank you – a lovely blog that addressed concerns very well ending with great hopefulness! It is helpful and reminds me to let go and lean into my own changes.
Thank you for continuing the dialogue. I for one, feel torn.